On her pees.
According to herpes commercials (herpescials), people believe they can’t spread this hilarious disease between outbreaks—abstinence-only education at work. I didn’t know the “I can’t see it, therefore it’s not there” mentality still exists. How do people even believe they have herpes in the first place? You know why atoms were so hard to adopt, why there was resistance to using soap to kill germs, why major scientific discoveries had to fight for acceptance? It was because of people like you. And now you have herpes. That’s how countless centuries of science get their revenge: Herpes. It’s ingenious, really. It’s not fatal (thanks to science—clearly intentional), but it is terribly humorous.